“The McRib Is Back!”
A brightly colored sign announced this to an overflowing McDonald’s. The food stylists, those people responsible for making sure that every photo of every item of food looks heavenly, have done a great job. The barbeque sauce looks tantalizing, the pickles and onions look crisp and refreshing and the bun looks fresh. The best looking fries and ice cold drink sit off to the side. It all just works together.
But me, I just shook my head. Under all that lovely looking accompaniment lies one of the strangest food experiences I’ve ever had. Ever. Years ago, when I lived with my grandmother and we were broker than broke, we were signed up with a food bank at a local church. We’d go over and pick up a couple of bags of staples to supplement what we could afford. One day, as we were unpacking the bags, we came across this large industrial plastic bag with a dozen or so patties in the bottom.
They were grayish brown and covered in ice, so we didn’t know what they were. We smelled them, something completely unrecognizable hit me, but I still couldn’t identify what kind of meat they were. So we put them in the freezer to figure out some other day. You know, when we got low on protein.
When we finally defrosted some, we started to see the faint shape of ribs…more accurately, a McRib. They were like little oily sponges of pork something-or-other once they were thawed. I’d never seen a texture like that in a grocery store before in my life. My 1st thought…“is this what scrapple looks like?”
But, we were hungry and it was time to cook them. So, into the pan they went. BIG mistake! Within 2 minutes, they were swimming in grease and a 3rd of their size. We ended up wrapping them in paper towels, a couple of times, to get as much of the grease off as possible before we ate them. They tasted alright, but my stomach was not happy. But, we thought it was our cooking method. They couldn’t be THAT bad right? This was the highly sought after McRib, after all.
But, sadly it was not. The next time, we tried to bake them. When we pulled them out of the over there were these small, still grayish brown, things floating in grease. I’ve never seen anything like it.
Needless to say, I never touch a McRib again. And this was before I gave up meat. All it did was make me wonder…what else is in this stuff?
