Thursday, October 8, 2009

FIGHT CLUB


I posted the following statement on Twitter this week:

"Are we that conditioned for conflict that we don't know how to function in its absence?"

Well that, I'm finding out, is really he question. We don't know how to function in peace, we are comfortable in conflict. Humans gravitate toward the thing they are most comfortable with and the truth of the matter is, if you only know one thing, everything will scare you. Even the positive stuff.

But, look around you. I mean really look. How many people do you see get visibly agitated when nothing is poppin off? No drama, no conflict, no one to talk about, no one to fight with. Everything around them is peaceful. But they can't rest. So, they act out, pick fights and basically stay in defense mode with everyone they encounter.

Here's an example: I answered a phone call at work and was trying to help a woman. I let her vent and then told her we would respond. She was stuck, she was so ready to fight with me to get what she wanted. Here I was giving her exactly what she was asking for and she didn't know how to respond. So she made the same statements and asked the same questions with a different approach over and over. My answer remained the same. She was trying to pick a fight and I didn't respond.

Now that was a woman I didn't even know. But, look a the people we do know. How many people you know don't know how to accept positive things into their lives? We bend over backward trying to make them happy, but it really won't matter. When people aren't happy, you can't fix that for them. All you can do is be there for them, tell them the truth and let them figure it out. If not, you'll end up sinking into their unhappiness trying to pull them out.

The reason I'm bringing this up is because I've come across too many unhappy people this year. Totally unhappy people. Internally unhappy people. I don't even think people realize that they're unhappy, but this year has been so trying that everyone's true colors have come out. And in that process, those none too pretty roots have been uncovered. So, what do we do to lift our collective spirits?

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